Watched that documentary on the manosphere.

And had to seek out some engrossing complex storytelling that paints a different picture of the world, men, women, people, families, and everything we’re facing.

Because even that very short, cursory, and very limited, peak inside was grim, like a nihilistic rabbit hole of mass villainry making.

What some young men are turning to get what they want, and some of what they need; women, attention, connection, a chance–they feel–at “the goods”; a feeling that they can succeed and dominate at something of “value,” access to adventure, power, influence, and peak experiences; purpose, and vision, and community, and belonging; a way of looking at the world that gives some context, or some reason, or some way of dealing with some of the terrible s— they’ve clearly experienced and witnessed as boys and young men, in their homes, and in their lives, and communities, it made me feel –what do they call that heavy feeling when you want a long nap, or you feel like you want to go for a long swim — it felt honestly super heavy and like …grim. Not the world I want for me, or anyone I care about.

Terrible people and systems stepping right in.

Men forming temporary gangs or mobs just for the purpose of beating up…. bad guys who harmed kids like them when they were kids, because what? are? the? police? and? the? law? going? to? do? about? any? of? it?…

People

Exploiting

Using

Recruiting.

And then there were the women,

–What the women, and what the young girls, see as their options to deal with any of it, —to receive ALL, or even SOME of all that needed attention, and stability, and caring, and value, and protection, and connection, a way out of the labor forever– work-forever, career-forever type of grinding–to receive some kind of honesty, and partnership, family, and structure, and safety, feelings of specialness, prioritization, being seen, access to feelings of choice, empowerment, connecting with the strength of men without fear of being harmed or unsafe, exploration, and enjoyment, while still feeling recognized and deeply known, and deeply cherished

and did I mention prioritized, and deeply known, and deeply cherished, and deeply seen,

the Mom putting up with it because that’s her son, and clearly her provider and protector who provides for all of her financial and material needs

and any hope for real connection, it all being replaced

by the girls and others, with direct fame-seeking,

for *Anything* *They* *Can* *Get* *The* *Fame* *For*

*Whatever The Cost,*

Boy, did I

❤️need❤️

that other storytelling.

And to believe that *other people* will hear *other options* for seeing and making a place for themselves in the world…

I really really looked for meaning, and exploration, and belonging, and variety, and adventure, and other options, and significance, and enjoyment, and answers to my endless questions, and curiosities… in art, media, books, in the variety of stories of friends, the variety of stories of family, and even acquaintances, when I was a kid…

and so did my friends, and so did my classmates.

I wonder if we were looking today what we would see.

And what we would think that meant about our place in the world.

Grateful for, literally, anyone setting out to make great art

to set out some picture of the world beyond even what they are seeing…

and of course grateful for any artist whose work to which I find myself deeply connecting…

and art and storytelling giving people other options and windows and meaning than what they are seeing…

because otherwise, people are just going to fall down these rabbit holes of cynicism and nihilism in their searches

for belonging,

for power,

or for cherishing,

and for relevance,

and for fairness,

and for justice,

and for enjoyment,

and for meaning.

and have no other way out…

…That could lead them to something great.

…That could lead them to–

a greater

more fulfilling,

more satisfying,

and more enjoyable

…sense of meaning.

xo, NP